Staying positive seems like an easy task, but how do we stay positive when everything around us seems solemn and gloomy? ‘Positive thinking’ has become such a mainstream phrase today with self-help books, social media posts and motivational speakers preaching it left, right and centre. But how do we actually apply this phrase to our life? The actual definition of the word ‘positive’ is the place to start. It seems a no-brainer, but we hear the word so often that sometimes it helps to actually define its meaning.

Define: Positive – ‘constructive, optimistic, or confident’

Great, so we have cleared that one up, now we actually have to apply this to our thinking attitude. Remaining ‘constructive, optimistic or confident’ is ironically, optimistic. The key to remember is that there is no ‘quick fix’ which most of us desire, so we must take small steps (that are often frustrating) to reach our long term goal.

1. Be honest with yourself – if you’re not feeling you’re most sunny, you don’t have to pretend you are. The best response to feeling negative is acknowledging these emotions and realising that they are perfectly natural.
2. Social Media – follow pages/blogs which make you feel good, or capture your interests. There’s nothing worse than following pages on, say Instagram, which force you to evaluate your life and ask yourself ‘why aren’t I looking like them’ or ‘why is everyone else having such a great time but me’. Social media is deceptive and the reality behind the lens/keyboard is often very different. For example, you may see a gorgeous beach babe flashing her pearly whites and impeccable abs on an exotic beach, whilst you’re sitting behind your phone in a boring lecture thinking ‘damn’. However, not everything is as peachy as it appears on social media, this model could be spending the rest of her day riddled with anxiety about how many likes her post will get. Fill your feed with inspirational material, it may just change your perceptions… see the bigger picture.
3. Surround yourself with the right people – As cringe worthy as it sounds ‘your vibe attracts your tribe’ could not be more accurate. Perhaps there are only a few people you really feel you can connect with – less is often more and quality is far more important than quantity. Spending time with people who you can be yourself around is so important, even if it’s someone you can feel sad with – connection is the key to positivity.
4. Gratitude – being thankful is such a powerful tool to keep you positive. Whether you list down on a piece of paper all the things you’re thankful for, or you simply reflect on what you have. Even if you feel that you have nothing, little things, like being thankful you have toilet roll to blow your nose! Anything is enough!
5. Acceptance – accept your thoughts, feelings and most importantly yourself. Every hero has their flaws, and just because you feel your losing now, doesn’t mean you will be forever. Don’t look to the future in doubt, realise we and everything in this world is in a constant state of flux. Nothing is permanent.

Go at your own pace and never apologise for how you feel. Everyone moves at their own pace and just because someone your age has everything mapped out, does not mean you have to. Your time will come.